sermon

The Study of Proverbs – Week 6

April 22, 2001

Sermon Series:

Sunday Evening Service sermon transcript

By looking a little bit at this whole role, not from the Book of Proverbs, when you get to Proverbs specific teachings, but this one is from 2 Timothy, and we’re gonna talk some about the role that Timothy’s mother and grandmother had in shaping him. And I think as we look at that, this is not a new concept, but I think it’s so important for mothers to realize the evangelistic effect they have on their children, that mothers can evangelize their children, can lead them to Christ. And that seems to be what happened in the life of Paul, in addition to the fact that Paul himself had a role. If you look at 2 Timothy Chapter 1, beginning at Verse 3, it says, “I thank God, whom I serve, as my forefathers did, with a clear conscience as night and day I constantly remember you in my prayers. Recalling your tears, I long to see you, so that I may be filled with joy.” So he’s talking about the warmth and the love that he has, Paul does for Timothy. And then in Verse 5, it says, “I have been reminded of your sincere faith.” The word literally means in the Greek un-hypocritical. It’s a genuine faith, “which first lived in your grandmother, Lois, and in your mother, Eunice, and I am persuaded now lives in you also.”

And so, there we have three generations within one family. We’ve got Lois and we have Eunice. And the way it’s lined up in the Greek, it seemed like the grandmother had it first and then the mother had it, and now Timothy got it. Now, we know that Timothy’s father was Greek and probably an unbeliever, so this really does speak to the tremendous impact that a single parent, a mother can have in bringing her children to Christ, but this was Lois first grandmother and then Eunice. But even more powerfully, we see it in 2 Timothy Chapter 3. In 2 Timothy 3, it says in Verse 10, “You, however, know all about my teaching, my way of life.” Now, stop right there, that’s something very powerful there. For you parents still with children that you’re training, that’s the whole shooting match, isn’t it? My teaching and my way of life. I mean, you can sum the whole thing up in those two categories. It’s what you teach, and it’s how you live.

Now, I know we talk a great deal about the second, you know, do as I say not as I do, and so example is everything. Well, example is not everything. Parents are to pass on precepts of faith to their children. They’re to pass on specific teachings, specific concepts from Scripture. They are to pass on those Bible stories. They are to read through Scriptures, they are to train them. And so, Timothy… I mean, Paul does that in his ministry with Timothy, that is discipleship. It’s a blending together of precepts of Biblical instruction along with a way of life, an instruction from… An example. Sorry. The two married together is the best of all, and that’s why he says in 1 Timothy, as a pastor, Timothy is to watch above all things, his life and his doctrine closely. Those are the two things married together. So you see in Verse 10, “You however, know all about my teaching, my way of life, my purpose, faith, patience, love, endurance, persecutions, sufferings, what kinds of things happened to me in Antioch, Iconium and Lystra, the persecutions I endured. And yet the Lord rescued me from all of them. In fact, everyone who wants to live a Godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted. While evil men and impostors will go from bad to worse, deceiving and being deceived.

Now look at Verse 14. “But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of. Because you know those from whom you learned it.” And I’ll stop there. He’s saying, continue in that body of doctrine, in that teaching, which was committed to you, and why. Because you know the nature of the people who passed it on to you. So again, we see the same thing, the body of doctrines married together with character, with a lifestyle, with an example. Now, of the two you could ask, which is more difficult? I think that they’re both difficult, you as a parent are responsible to know the Scriptures. You can’t be embarrassed about your knowledge of the Bible. So you have to train yourself so that you know the Bible well enough to pass it on to your children, or your grandchildren. That you are to well… Know the Scriptures well enough to do that, but then you also have to live them out, and who is equal to such a task? Who is equal to living out the Godliness and the example that’s put in Scripture?

But he says, “You know those from whom you learned it and how from infancy,” Verse 15, “You have known the Scriptures.” Infancy, right from the start, Timothy, you were trained in the Bible. Right from the beginning. Now, for me, this and other passages settles it. Parents need to be training their children in the Bible. They need to be training them constantly. We read last time that we studied Proverbs, a number of weeks ago, about Deuteronomy 6. And how the parents were to sharpen the commands into their children, like the wedding stone. Sharpening, sharpening them into their children by repetition. And so, how from infancy you have known the Scriptures. “Well, they don’t speak English. How can we teach them the Bible?” At some point they will, what better book to learn English from than the Bible, right? Right from the start.

When I was in Japan and I taught people English from the Scriptures, and that’s how they learned. They had no choice. It was a free English class. Other classes charged $100 an hour. I said, “This is free, but we’re gonna use the Bible.” All right, that’s fine. And so we used the Scriptures. What better book to learn English from? But how from infancy, you have known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise. They’re able to make you wise. Now, when we go to Proverbs in a minute, you’re gonna see what an issue wisdom and foolishness is. There are wise sons and there are foolish sons. There are wise daughters and there are foolish daughters. And what is it that can transform a fool into a wise person? And by the way, they come to you sweet and cuddly and beautiful and foolish. They don’t come wise. It’s not like they’re wise, and then we train them into foolishness.

The Scripture testifies clearly that foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child. And they have to be trained into wisdom. And what is it that brings them to wisdom? The Scriptures, not your example. Your example is very important, but it’s the Scriptures which transforms a foolish heart into a wise heart. And how from infancy you have known the Holy Scriptures, which were able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. And so, what I’m exhorting you to do as parents and grandparents and as community members, members of the faith here, is to say parents need to have an evangelistic impact on their kids. They need to lead their kids to faith in Christ, and then you do it with the Scriptures. How from infancy you have known the Holy Scriptures, which were able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for…

And now, these four things I think should characterize your teaching ministry as a parent. Teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness. Teaching is just imparting precepts, things that they didn’t know before. Rebuking is that word of correction, a sharp word which wakes them up and says, “I’m not living right and I need to stop.” Teaching, rebuking, correcting is a gentle adjustment, a course correction, so you need to go differently than you’ve been going and training in righteousness. All of these things. So that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work. So this is what I’m exhorting you parents to do, take the evangelistic and the discipleship life of your children seriously and realize, no, it’s not up to the Sunday school teacher. It’s not up to the youth department, it’s up to you. And we have a role to play that’s true, but it’s primarily the parents.

Now let’s look at Proverbs, and I’d like you to begin. We studied last time in Proverbs Chapter 1, 2, and 3, over and over, there’s this language. Listen my son to your father’s instruction… You can look there if you want. Chapter 1 Verse 8, “Listen my son to your father’s instruction, do not forsake your mother’s teaching, there will be a garland to grace your head and a chain to adorn your neck.

“We talked about that, how both the father and mother are to instruct and to train their children in righteousness. In Chapter 2 Verse 1-9, as we discussed last time, “My son, if you accept my words and store up my commands within you, turning your ear to wisdom and applying your heart to understanding, and if you call out for insight, and cry aloud for understanding, and if you look for it as for silver and search for it as for hidden treasure. Then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God. For the Lord gives wisdom and from his mouth comes knowledge and understanding.”

Chapter 2 Verse 1-6, and then Chapter 3 Verse 1-6, “My son, do not forget my teaching, but keep my commands in your heart, for they will prolong your life many years and bring you prosperity. Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart.” And so, what the father is saying here is, take my precepts, take my specific lines of teaching and write them down. Bind them around your heart, and keep them with you, so that you can remember what it is I’ve taught you to do. And so, Proverbs 1 and 2 and 3, all begin the same way. 3:4 says, “then you will win favor and a good name in the sight of God and man. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight.” Now, these are famous verses, Proverbs 3, 5, and 6, but they’re set in the context of fatherly exhortation to a son, a family instruction.

It is the father saying to the son or the mother saying to the daughter. It is the parents saying to the children, trust in the Lord with all of your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him and He will direct your paths. And then in Chapter 6 Verse 20-23, “My son, keep your Father’s commands and do not forsake your mother’s teaching. Bind them upon your heart forever, fasten them around your neck. When you walk, they will guide you. When you sleep, they will watch over you, when you are awake, they will speak to you, for these commands are a lamp that’s teaching us a light and corrections of discipline are a way to life.”

Now, the next topic we covered last time was the issue of discipline. Now the first thing that I wanted to say, this can be a controversial topic, people immediately talk about corporal punishment or spankings and all that, but I think the proper way to understand it is in the issue of discipleship. We are the disciples of our children or grandchildren. We are to train them in righteousness, we’re to disciple them. There is, I believe, in all the world, no discipling relationship as significant as that of parent and child. We have the maximum impact on our disciples if there are children or grandchildren, but especially parent and child, maximum impact. And so, we are to disciple our children. Now, there are times in discipleship when discipline is needed, and doesn’t the Heavenly Father do that for us? And do you all enjoy that, to be disciplined by God?

Well, of course, you don’t. It says in the Book of Hebrews, “No discipline is pleasant at the time but painful, later on, however, yields a harvest of righteousness and peace by those who have been trained by it.” And so it says in Proverbs 3:11-12, “My son, do not despise the Lord’s discipline and do not resent his rebuke, because the Lord disciplines those he loves, and as a father, a son, he delights in.” Proverbs 22:15, as we mentioned, we start from the very beginning. “Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline will drive it far from him.” Folly is bound up in the heart of a child. Now, we have the idea of a child being basically good until we parents and society pervert them, but it’s not that way, not at all. And we should thank God that children don’t come out of the womb fully formed as adults, fully able to act on wherever their character is at at that point. We’d be in big trouble.

Thankfully, they’re helpless and cute, and they can’t do much to live out of their basically selfish framework. And so, we have some time with them, some time to train them in a basic concept in the center, I think of all kind of ethical parenting is this: the preciousness of others, the preciousness of others. Does a little infant have the preciousness of others in mind? Not at all. They have to be trained into the preciousness of others, and it takes years, doesn’t it? Some never learn it, some never learn it. But foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child, and the rod of discipline drives it far from. And we talked about how discipline demonstrates love. He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.

Now we discuss the rod, the rod is physical, it’s a literal rod in some cases. But it’s also a symbol of a whole discipleship life and a disciplining life. It’s more complex than just corporal punishment. It’s a whole bunch of causes and effects that parents are setting up all the time. Now, any of you who have children, you know what I’m talking about. How many times do you feel like you need the wisdom of Solomon to judge this or that case? What am I gonna do? How shall I address this situation? Now, you can remember that. Now that you’re grandparents, some of you don’t need to. You just pray for your children that they’d have the wisdom to know what to do. But the situation has come along, and I know Christy and I look at each other and we don’t know what to do. And so, the Book of Hebrews Chapter 12 says, “Our Fathers disciplined us as they thought best, according to their wisdom, but God disciplines us according to his, and it’s perfect wisdom.”

But there’s a whole system, a whole structure of discipleship going on here of causes and effects of what we call the carrot and the stick. Of motivation, something to induce positive behavior and also chastisement for negative behavior. Proverbs 23:13-14 says, “Do not withhold discipline from a child. If you punish him with the rod, he will not die. Punish him with the rod and save his soul from death.” Really, the thing that’s striking about Proverbs 23:14 is that the training a parent does to a child actually has an eternal consequence on their soul. It has an eternal consequence. We want our children to be with us in heaven, don’t we? We want our children to stand with us on judgment day, blameless and full of great joy through faith in Jesus Christ.

And according to this, the discipling we do and the training is a part of that, a very important, Proverbs 23:14. And then 29:15, “The rod of correction imparts wisdom, but a child left to himself disgraces his mother.” Interesting. Disgraces his mother. And so, the parents are responsible to train their children. We finished up last week with Proverbs 22:6, “Train up a child according to the way he should go… ” So your NIV translation says. “And even when he’s old, he will not depart from it.” And I suggested to you maybe a more careful translation, a literal translation would be, train up a child according to his way, and when he’s old, he will not depart from it. Well, what does that mean? Well, there’s a pessimistic way of understanding that, and then there’s just a practical way. What is the pessimistic way? Well, what is a child’s way? What is THEIR way? What’s that?

It’s bad or foolish, self-centered. So train a child the way he wants you to, and when he’s old, he’ll still be living that way. You’ll never have changed them. There was never a breaking, there was never a yielding, there was never a sense of create in me O God a pure heart. There was never a brokenness and contrite spirit. It never happened. And these things are required for salvation, are they not? This is the very thing that we bring to God. A broken and contrite spirit O God, you will not despise. And so, that never occurred. And so, train up a child according to HIS way is, let him live the way that he wants to, and when he’s old, he will still be living that way, that’s the pessimistic approach.

Then there’s just the practical approach, Train up a child according to his way, meaning, carefully observing the way he’s living. What is he doing? How is he living? And train according to his way, and from that training, he will not depart. Good or bad. But if you train a child according to his way, watching what he’s doing, he’s going to be staying in that way the rest of his life. In that practical way, what you’re saying is that parent-child relationship is incredibly important. 

Have you ever heard the story about the apple in the bottle? I think you’ve heard that before. The example of the apple in the bottle, a grandfather had an apple inside a clear glass bottle and his grandson looked up and said, “What in the world is that? Well, that’s an apple in a bottle. Take a look at it.” Takes it down and there’s no seam in it, there’s no crack. The apple is huge, much larger than the small opening to the bottle. He said, “Grandpa, how in the world did you get to apple inside the bottle?” He said, “Come with me.” Takes him out to the orchard and on a special tree, there’s a bottle on the branch. It’s actually already put on the branch and the sun light is coming through and the apple is growing up inside the bottle. You can’t get an apple inside the bottle after it’s fully grown, you have to start young. And so, 22:6 is saying, train up a child according to his way, and that’s kinda the way he’s gonna be living the rest of his life. So that’s 22:6.

Now, as I said, some of you have cross-stitched it and put it up there. It’s a great verse, I’m not trying to take 22:6 away from you. I’m just saying, don’t think that it means that if your teen is going through rebellion, they’re going to return back to the way that they were trained originally. That’s not what the Verse is saying. It’s actually talking about a never departing, not a returning. It says nothing about a returning. It says about a consistent walking in that path, whatever it is. So that’s what we talked about last time.

And the final thing I wanna say about discipline is that those who are being disciplined should not lose heart or be discouraged. It says In 15:5, Proverbs 15:5, “a fool spurns his father’s discipline, but whoever heeds correction shows prudence.” 15:5, a fool spurns his father’s discipline, but whoever heeds correction shows prudence.

And then again, seven Verses later, 15:12, “a mocker resents correction, he will not consult the wise.” So, a child should not resent the correction, a child should submit to the correction, should be glad about the correction. Glad to have a father and a mother who will train the child, the son or daughter. So that’s the whole approach to disciplining.

Now, the Book of Proverbs also gives us a listing of certain problems that parents are gonna face with their children and how they handle them. Probably the central problem that parents face is the issue of disobedience or rebellion. You need to tell a child to do something and they don’t do it. You tell a child not to do something, and they do it. How can that be? Now, Bill Cosby says it’s insanity or brain damage. That’s his approach.

He thinks it’s brain damage. You say, Don’t touch that thing, you turn away, turn back and they’ve touched it. And he thinks it’s brain damage. Well, I’m not so sure it’s brain damage, but I think that there’s definitely a character issue. I think our hearts are bent toward rebellion. Look at Proverbs 24:21-22. The real issue on disobedience is not parent-child, it’s child-God, that’s the real issue. It’s the relationship between the child and God. So 24:21-22 says, “Fear the Lord and the king, my son, and do not join with the rebellious. For those two will send sudden destruction upon them, and who knows what calamities they can bring.”

Now, so what the father is saying to his son here is fear authority structures, and there’s two of them in this Verse. You’ve got God, the ultimate authority and then the king, kind of governmental authorities. And so parents are to train their children to submit to authority, because if they don’t, there’s going to be consequences down the road. Consequences with the government in this case, king, and ultimately, consequences with God himself. Fear the Lord and the king, my son and do not join with the rebellious, for those two will send sudden destruction upon them, and who knows what calamities they can bring. Now, where does disobedience lead? Well, it can lead to heartbreak for parents. 

Look at 10:1, Proverbs 10:1. “A wise son brings joy to his father, but a foolish son grief to his mother.” In other words, if you have a wise son you can rejoice in that relationship. Father will rejoice in that relationship, a foolish son brings grief to his mother, there’s sadness in the relationship. I think one of the biggest mistakes that parents make is trying to be too friendly with their kids too soon. Do you know what I’m talking about? They wanna be pals with them right off? And I think it’s good to be friends with your children, but I’m kind of playing for the 60% of their life rather than the first 40%. I’m kind of hoping for the last two thirds, not that we don’t have a loving… Actually, we do have a very loving relationship, but we are specifically trying to be mom and dad right now, not buddy. And so one of the most important things that a mom and dad can do is train the children to submit to authority. And so they want to have a good relationship, and if you wanna have a good relationship, then train up a wise son or daughter. And they’ll bring joy to you the rest of their lives.

Look at 15:20. “A wise son brings joy to his father, but a foolish man despises his mother.” Now, it’s kind of interesting, it starts out in 10:1 a foolish son brings grief to his mother, but by the time we’re at 15:20, the foolish man is despising his mother, so we see a degeneration here in the book of Proverbs, look at 19:26. 19:26 says, “He who robs his father and drives out his mother is a son who brings shame and disgrace.” Boy, it’s getting worse. At first, we had just the foolish son, then we have a foolish man despising his mother, then we have somebody who’s robbing his father and driving out his mother, bringing shame and disgrace. Now 28:24. 28:24 says, “He who robs his father or mother and says it’s not wrong, he is a partner to him who destroys.” So now he’s robbing his parents and has no conscience about it. He’s got absolutely no conviction that it’s wrong. His heart is dead and then the final in the sequence is 20:20, Proverbs 20:20. “If a man curses his father or mother, his lamp will be snuffed out in pitch darkness.” That’s the final end.

A man who curses his father or mother. And why is that? Because father and mother represents authority to that child. That’s why the Ten Commandments says honour your father and mother, that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth. And so there’s a degeneration in here, and it all begins with disobedience, with rebellion at the start. The ultimate end is groaning. Chapter 5:11 and following says, “At the end of your life you will groan and when your flesh and body are spent, you will say how I hated discipline, how my heart spurned correction. I would not obey my teachers or listen to my instructors. I have come to the brink of utter ruin in the midst of the whole assembly.”

So that’s the dark path. It’s the path of disobedience and it starts young, doesn’t it? Starts right from the beginning. And so parents are to train their children in obedience, and the ultimate standard here, I think is in the Lord’s Prayer, Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven.

That’s a high standard, isn’t it? So in our household, your children need to obey here in this household, the way that the angels do in heaven. And you know what our slogan is on that. How do the angels obey in heaven? All the way, right away and with a happy spirit. All the way, right away and with a happy spirit. And so in our household, if any child fails on one of those three points, it’s disobedience, that’s simple. If they obey all the way right away, but they grumble, moan, and complain about it, it’s disobedience. If they say, “Sure, dad, I’ll do that,” and then three hours later, guess what? It’s not done. It’s disobedience. Jesus even told a story about that. Remember about the son who said, “Sure, I’ll go out and work in the field,” and he never went, never went. So thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Obey like the angels do, all the way, right away with a happy spirit.

Another problem that parents face these days is that of disrespect. “Yes, mother. Argh!” this kind of thing, it grieves my heart and I can do the imitations and all that, but I don’t want to…I don’t wanna play it out, you’ve seen it before, and it should grieve you too. This is not acceptable. This is not a proper way for a child to respond to a parent. The rolling eyes, the sigh, all that kind of thing. It’s disrespect, it’s really a form of rebellion. It says In 30:11 and following, “There are those who curse their fathers and do not bless their mothers. There are those who are pure in their own eyes and yet not cleansed of their filth. There are those whose eyes are ever so haughty, whose glances are so disdainful.” Have you ever seen that look? The haughty eyes, the disdainful glance, the rolling look? You know what I’m saying? The rebel sigh, it’s in one of our hymns. “Alright, I’ll do it,” like that. And then 30:17 is even tougher. Now, I didn’t write this. I don’t want you to think I wrote this, okay. I didn’t stick this in your Bible. It’s here though. 30:17, “The eye that mocks a father, that scorns obedience to a mother will be pecked out by the ravens of the valley and eaten by vultures.” Why did you have to read that? Well, first of all, it’s in the Bible, so it’s worth reading. But I think what it’s talking about here is the eye, the rolling eye, the scorn… It really is showing an attitude of the heart, and the heart attitude is one of rebellion against God.

So actually, I use that verse to say, “Okay, that’s the big bad Bible Verse, I’m your dad and I love you, and I’m just going to discipline the look. I’m not gonna be doing any pecking out or any vulture thing right now, I’m just going to discipline you okay, before we get the big bad Bible on you, okay, who’s gonna come in and do even worse, okay, let’s not have the rolling eye. We’re not gonna have that kind of look in our family. We’re gonna say yes, dad and do it right away.” That’s all.

Another problem that children face is complaining. Of course, you all have conquered that, I’m sure. So I’m not really talking to any of you. I’m sure none of you have complained in years about any of the circumstances that face you because you know that it says in Philippians 2:14, “Do everything without complaining or arguing.” So complaining is right out of all you mature people. But for those of you that are still training those that are complaining realise that it’s a big problem. It’s a big issue. One of the things that I heard recently from a pastor that really stuck with me. And I think there’s so much theological truth to it, and it’s profound. Whenever he was greeted by somebody and somebody asked how are you doing? Or how is it going for you? His answer is always the same, Better than I deserve.

Stop and think about that. Better than I deserve. Is there a theological truth behind that? Yeah, all of us are sinners and we deserve the wrath of God for our sin. Instead we get grace and from his fullness, one blessing after another. Isn’t that what God’s given us? One grace after another. “Yes, but I deserve it,” but no, you don’t. One blessing after another. And so when we’re feeding cold cereal to our children, you know the ready to eat. I’m not talking cold oatmeal, I’m talking about pouring cereal, that stuff is expensive. Have you priced… It’s over $3 a box. And I’ve actually heard from time to time complaints about cold cereal, which I’ve eaten most of my life, and I like it. What do you like? Corn Flakes, Do you eat cold cereal? No? Never? You guys? Fruit Loops. See, not only is it good for you, it tastes good. How can we ever get sick of the things that God gives us, but yet there’s complaining. So listen, it shows a heart attitude, Better than I deserve. God is giving me nutritious food, it tastes good to me, and even if it is the same thing, 40 years in a row. That’s in the desert… Remember, manna and all that, even if it’s the same thing 40 years in a row, it’s still grace from God, isn’t it? And so we’re weeding out complaining.

Another is the issue of setting a bad example. Siblings are to set a good example for their children. Look at 10:17, “He who heeds discipline shows the way to life, but whoever ignores correction leads others astray.” So a big brother or a big sister can lead another astray by how they act. But a wise brother, wise sister will say, Hey I have a responsibility to the family and the responsibility to set a good example. I wanna set a good example. I don’t wanna be foolish, I don’t wanna spurn correction. I want to yield to correction and I don’t wanna lead others astray. 

Well, these other topics, I think we’re gonna cover. I think there’s a couple other things that I think are worth discussing within this context, we’re gonna talk about sexual purity another time. But it’s remarkable how the issue of marital purity is taught within the context of father and mother instruction to a son. At least three times in the Book of Proverbs, the father and mother are instructing the son to watch out for a certain type of woman. And since the Book of Proverbs, interestingly enough, is written, mom and dad to son and not to daughter, it just seems to be just the structure of the book, but we also can extend it out to daughters, there’s certain kind of young men that you need to watch out for and be careful about. Okay, and so there’s instruction about that, we’re gonna read through it, but if you wanna just look at the reference, Chapter 7 Verse 1-27, and also Chapter 6 Verse 20-35.

We’ll talk about purity at another topic, we’re gonna give a whole topic to it, but it also extends even to what people wear. Even what young ladies wear. If you look at Proverbs 11:22, Proverbs 11:22, interesting Proverb. It says, “Like a gold ring in a pig snout is a beautiful woman who shows no discretion.” A very interesting Proverb. And I think Proverbs is spicy. I’m telling you what… You read something that’s like, Whoa, it doesn’t leave a bland impact on you, a gold ring in a pig snout? What’s the point? It’s still a pig, even though there’s a gold ring there. And what is it saying, the saying is what is truly important is the character of the individual. And the outer dress is not so important, except in that it can lead others astray.

And so I think it’s up to, especially parents to be with their younger daughters and say, “Listen, dress with modesty, with decency, don’t lead your brothers in Christ astray. But dress with modesty. Don’t be like a gold ring in a pig snout, beautiful dress, showing out physically what it is you have to offer, but there’s nothing in the soul, in the spirit, but rather be… ” As it says in 1 Peter 3, “Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes, instead it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is a great worth in God’s sight.”

The final word of advice tonight, 23:22-25, it says, “Listen to your father who gave you life and do not despise your mother when she is old. Buy the truth and do not sell it.” Isn’t that something? Did any of your parents ever give you advice in the stock market? Okay, what you want to do is you want to buy and not sell. Alright, hold on to it. If it’s good stock in the end, it’s going to pay incredible dividends.

Well, in effect, this father’s saying, That’s what truth is all about, buy it and don’t sell. Don’t ever give up that stock. Buy the truth and don’t sell it. Get wisdom, discipline and understanding. The father of a righteous man has great joy, he who has a wise son delights in him. May your father and mother be glad, may she who gave you birth, rejoice.

Prayer

Won’t you close with me in prayer. Father, we thank you for the wisdom that comes from contemplating your word. We thank you for the spicy truths found in the Book of Proverbs. We thank you that they wake us up and help us to see things that we might have missed. Father, I pray that you would help every father and mother who’s listening to me today who’s still training their children, that they might raise them in righteousness. That they might lead them to Christ. I pray for any that are grandparents that are praying earnestly for their grandchildren, that they pray wisdom for their children as they raise their grandchildren. Father, I pray for this church, First Baptist Church, as a community of faith, that we may be conducive to parents raising Godly children. Father, I pray that we might raise a generation of those who fear you, who love you and who will obey you. And all the more who will stand before you on that final day, blameless and with great joy through faith in Jesus Christ, in whose name we pray, Amen.

Sunday Evening Service sermon transcript

By looking a little bit at this whole role, not from the Book of Proverbs, when you get to Proverbs specific teachings, but this one is from 2 Timothy, and we’re gonna talk some about the role that Timothy’s mother and grandmother had in shaping him. And I think as we look at that, this is not a new concept, but I think it’s so important for mothers to realize the evangelistic effect they have on their children, that mothers can evangelize their children, can lead them to Christ. And that seems to be what happened in the life of Paul, in addition to the fact that Paul himself had a role. If you look at 2 Timothy Chapter 1, beginning at Verse 3, it says, “I thank God, whom I serve, as my forefathers did, with a clear conscience as night and day I constantly remember you in my prayers. Recalling your tears, I long to see you, so that I may be filled with joy.” So he’s talking about the warmth and the love that he has, Paul does for Timothy. And then in Verse 5, it says, “I have been reminded of your sincere faith.” The word literally means in the Greek un-hypocritical. It’s a genuine faith, “which first lived in your grandmother, Lois, and in your mother, Eunice, and I am persuaded now lives in you also.”

And so, there we have three generations within one family. We’ve got Lois and we have Eunice. And the way it’s lined up in the Greek, it seemed like the grandmother had it first and then the mother had it, and now Timothy got it. Now, we know that Timothy’s father was Greek and probably an unbeliever, so this really does speak to the tremendous impact that a single parent, a mother can have in bringing her children to Christ, but this was Lois first grandmother and then Eunice. But even more powerfully, we see it in 2 Timothy Chapter 3. In 2 Timothy 3, it says in Verse 10, “You, however, know all about my teaching, my way of life.” Now, stop right there, that’s something very powerful there. For you parents still with children that you’re training, that’s the whole shooting match, isn’t it? My teaching and my way of life. I mean, you can sum the whole thing up in those two categories. It’s what you teach, and it’s how you live.

Now, I know we talk a great deal about the second, you know, do as I say not as I do, and so example is everything. Well, example is not everything. Parents are to pass on precepts of faith to their children. They’re to pass on specific teachings, specific concepts from Scripture. They are to pass on those Bible stories. They are to read through Scriptures, they are to train them. And so, Timothy… I mean, Paul does that in his ministry with Timothy, that is discipleship. It’s a blending together of precepts of Biblical instruction along with a way of life, an instruction from… An example. Sorry. The two married together is the best of all, and that’s why he says in 1 Timothy, as a pastor, Timothy is to watch above all things, his life and his doctrine closely. Those are the two things married together. So you see in Verse 10, “You however, know all about my teaching, my way of life, my purpose, faith, patience, love, endurance, persecutions, sufferings, what kinds of things happened to me in Antioch, Iconium and Lystra, the persecutions I endured. And yet the Lord rescued me from all of them. In fact, everyone who wants to live a Godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted. While evil men and impostors will go from bad to worse, deceiving and being deceived.

Now look at Verse 14. “But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of. Because you know those from whom you learned it.” And I’ll stop there. He’s saying, continue in that body of doctrine, in that teaching, which was committed to you, and why. Because you know the nature of the people who passed it on to you. So again, we see the same thing, the body of doctrines married together with character, with a lifestyle, with an example. Now, of the two you could ask, which is more difficult? I think that they’re both difficult, you as a parent are responsible to know the Scriptures. You can’t be embarrassed about your knowledge of the Bible. So you have to train yourself so that you know the Bible well enough to pass it on to your children, or your grandchildren. That you are to well… Know the Scriptures well enough to do that, but then you also have to live them out, and who is equal to such a task? Who is equal to living out the Godliness and the example that’s put in Scripture?

But he says, “You know those from whom you learned it and how from infancy,” Verse 15, “You have known the Scriptures.” Infancy, right from the start, Timothy, you were trained in the Bible. Right from the beginning. Now, for me, this and other passages settles it. Parents need to be training their children in the Bible. They need to be training them constantly. We read last time that we studied Proverbs, a number of weeks ago, about Deuteronomy 6. And how the parents were to sharpen the commands into their children, like the wedding stone. Sharpening, sharpening them into their children by repetition. And so, how from infancy you have known the Scriptures. “Well, they don’t speak English. How can we teach them the Bible?” At some point they will, what better book to learn English from than the Bible, right? Right from the start.

When I was in Japan and I taught people English from the Scriptures, and that’s how they learned. They had no choice. It was a free English class. Other classes charged $100 an hour. I said, “This is free, but we’re gonna use the Bible.” All right, that’s fine. And so we used the Scriptures. What better book to learn English from? But how from infancy, you have known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise. They’re able to make you wise. Now, when we go to Proverbs in a minute, you’re gonna see what an issue wisdom and foolishness is. There are wise sons and there are foolish sons. There are wise daughters and there are foolish daughters. And what is it that can transform a fool into a wise person? And by the way, they come to you sweet and cuddly and beautiful and foolish. They don’t come wise. It’s not like they’re wise, and then we train them into foolishness.

The Scripture testifies clearly that foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child. And they have to be trained into wisdom. And what is it that brings them to wisdom? The Scriptures, not your example. Your example is very important, but it’s the Scriptures which transforms a foolish heart into a wise heart. And how from infancy you have known the Holy Scriptures, which were able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. And so, what I’m exhorting you to do as parents and grandparents and as community members, members of the faith here, is to say parents need to have an evangelistic impact on their kids. They need to lead their kids to faith in Christ, and then you do it with the Scriptures. How from infancy you have known the Holy Scriptures, which were able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for…

And now, these four things I think should characterize your teaching ministry as a parent. Teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness. Teaching is just imparting precepts, things that they didn’t know before. Rebuking is that word of correction, a sharp word which wakes them up and says, “I’m not living right and I need to stop.” Teaching, rebuking, correcting is a gentle adjustment, a course correction, so you need to go differently than you’ve been going and training in righteousness. All of these things. So that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work. So this is what I’m exhorting you parents to do, take the evangelistic and the discipleship life of your children seriously and realize, no, it’s not up to the Sunday school teacher. It’s not up to the youth department, it’s up to you. And we have a role to play that’s true, but it’s primarily the parents.

Now let’s look at Proverbs, and I’d like you to begin. We studied last time in Proverbs Chapter 1, 2, and 3, over and over, there’s this language. Listen my son to your father’s instruction… You can look there if you want. Chapter 1 Verse 8, “Listen my son to your father’s instruction, do not forsake your mother’s teaching, there will be a garland to grace your head and a chain to adorn your neck.

“We talked about that, how both the father and mother are to instruct and to train their children in righteousness. In Chapter 2 Verse 1-9, as we discussed last time, “My son, if you accept my words and store up my commands within you, turning your ear to wisdom and applying your heart to understanding, and if you call out for insight, and cry aloud for understanding, and if you look for it as for silver and search for it as for hidden treasure. Then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God. For the Lord gives wisdom and from his mouth comes knowledge and understanding.”

Chapter 2 Verse 1-6, and then Chapter 3 Verse 1-6, “My son, do not forget my teaching, but keep my commands in your heart, for they will prolong your life many years and bring you prosperity. Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart.” And so, what the father is saying here is, take my precepts, take my specific lines of teaching and write them down. Bind them around your heart, and keep them with you, so that you can remember what it is I’ve taught you to do. And so, Proverbs 1 and 2 and 3, all begin the same way. 3:4 says, “then you will win favor and a good name in the sight of God and man. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight.” Now, these are famous verses, Proverbs 3, 5, and 6, but they’re set in the context of fatherly exhortation to a son, a family instruction.

It is the father saying to the son or the mother saying to the daughter. It is the parents saying to the children, trust in the Lord with all of your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him and He will direct your paths. And then in Chapter 6 Verse 20-23, “My son, keep your Father’s commands and do not forsake your mother’s teaching. Bind them upon your heart forever, fasten them around your neck. When you walk, they will guide you. When you sleep, they will watch over you, when you are awake, they will speak to you, for these commands are a lamp that’s teaching us a light and corrections of discipline are a way to life.”

Now, the next topic we covered last time was the issue of discipline. Now the first thing that I wanted to say, this can be a controversial topic, people immediately talk about corporal punishment or spankings and all that, but I think the proper way to understand it is in the issue of discipleship. We are the disciples of our children or grandchildren. We are to train them in righteousness, we’re to disciple them. There is, I believe, in all the world, no discipling relationship as significant as that of parent and child. We have the maximum impact on our disciples if there are children or grandchildren, but especially parent and child, maximum impact. And so, we are to disciple our children. Now, there are times in discipleship when discipline is needed, and doesn’t the Heavenly Father do that for us? And do you all enjoy that, to be disciplined by God?

Well, of course, you don’t. It says in the Book of Hebrews, “No discipline is pleasant at the time but painful, later on, however, yields a harvest of righteousness and peace by those who have been trained by it.” And so it says in Proverbs 3:11-12, “My son, do not despise the Lord’s discipline and do not resent his rebuke, because the Lord disciplines those he loves, and as a father, a son, he delights in.” Proverbs 22:15, as we mentioned, we start from the very beginning. “Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline will drive it far from him.” Folly is bound up in the heart of a child. Now, we have the idea of a child being basically good until we parents and society pervert them, but it’s not that way, not at all. And we should thank God that children don’t come out of the womb fully formed as adults, fully able to act on wherever their character is at at that point. We’d be in big trouble.

Thankfully, they’re helpless and cute, and they can’t do much to live out of their basically selfish framework. And so, we have some time with them, some time to train them in a basic concept in the center, I think of all kind of ethical parenting is this: the preciousness of others, the preciousness of others. Does a little infant have the preciousness of others in mind? Not at all. They have to be trained into the preciousness of others, and it takes years, doesn’t it? Some never learn it, some never learn it. But foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child, and the rod of discipline drives it far from. And we talked about how discipline demonstrates love. He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.

Now we discuss the rod, the rod is physical, it’s a literal rod in some cases. But it’s also a symbol of a whole discipleship life and a disciplining life. It’s more complex than just corporal punishment. It’s a whole bunch of causes and effects that parents are setting up all the time. Now, any of you who have children, you know what I’m talking about. How many times do you feel like you need the wisdom of Solomon to judge this or that case? What am I gonna do? How shall I address this situation? Now, you can remember that. Now that you’re grandparents, some of you don’t need to. You just pray for your children that they’d have the wisdom to know what to do. But the situation has come along, and I know Christy and I look at each other and we don’t know what to do. And so, the Book of Hebrews Chapter 12 says, “Our Fathers disciplined us as they thought best, according to their wisdom, but God disciplines us according to his, and it’s perfect wisdom.”

But there’s a whole system, a whole structure of discipleship going on here of causes and effects of what we call the carrot and the stick. Of motivation, something to induce positive behavior and also chastisement for negative behavior. Proverbs 23:13-14 says, “Do not withhold discipline from a child. If you punish him with the rod, he will not die. Punish him with the rod and save his soul from death.” Really, the thing that’s striking about Proverbs 23:14 is that the training a parent does to a child actually has an eternal consequence on their soul. It has an eternal consequence. We want our children to be with us in heaven, don’t we? We want our children to stand with us on judgment day, blameless and full of great joy through faith in Jesus Christ.

And according to this, the discipling we do and the training is a part of that, a very important, Proverbs 23:14. And then 29:15, “The rod of correction imparts wisdom, but a child left to himself disgraces his mother.” Interesting. Disgraces his mother. And so, the parents are responsible to train their children. We finished up last week with Proverbs 22:6, “Train up a child according to the way he should go… ” So your NIV translation says. “And even when he’s old, he will not depart from it.” And I suggested to you maybe a more careful translation, a literal translation would be, train up a child according to his way, and when he’s old, he will not depart from it. Well, what does that mean? Well, there’s a pessimistic way of understanding that, and then there’s just a practical way. What is the pessimistic way? Well, what is a child’s way? What is THEIR way? What’s that?

It’s bad or foolish, self-centered. So train a child the way he wants you to, and when he’s old, he’ll still be living that way. You’ll never have changed them. There was never a breaking, there was never a yielding, there was never a sense of create in me O God a pure heart. There was never a brokenness and contrite spirit. It never happened. And these things are required for salvation, are they not? This is the very thing that we bring to God. A broken and contrite spirit O God, you will not despise. And so, that never occurred. And so, train up a child according to HIS way is, let him live the way that he wants to, and when he’s old, he will still be living that way, that’s the pessimistic approach.

Then there’s just the practical approach, Train up a child according to his way, meaning, carefully observing the way he’s living. What is he doing? How is he living? And train according to his way, and from that training, he will not depart. Good or bad. But if you train a child according to his way, watching what he’s doing, he’s going to be staying in that way the rest of his life. In that practical way, what you’re saying is that parent-child relationship is incredibly important. 

Have you ever heard the story about the apple in the bottle? I think you’ve heard that before. The example of the apple in the bottle, a grandfather had an apple inside a clear glass bottle and his grandson looked up and said, “What in the world is that? Well, that’s an apple in a bottle. Take a look at it.” Takes it down and there’s no seam in it, there’s no crack. The apple is huge, much larger than the small opening to the bottle. He said, “Grandpa, how in the world did you get to apple inside the bottle?” He said, “Come with me.” Takes him out to the orchard and on a special tree, there’s a bottle on the branch. It’s actually already put on the branch and the sun light is coming through and the apple is growing up inside the bottle. You can’t get an apple inside the bottle after it’s fully grown, you have to start young. And so, 22:6 is saying, train up a child according to his way, and that’s kinda the way he’s gonna be living the rest of his life. So that’s 22:6.

Now, as I said, some of you have cross-stitched it and put it up there. It’s a great verse, I’m not trying to take 22:6 away from you. I’m just saying, don’t think that it means that if your teen is going through rebellion, they’re going to return back to the way that they were trained originally. That’s not what the Verse is saying. It’s actually talking about a never departing, not a returning. It says nothing about a returning. It says about a consistent walking in that path, whatever it is. So that’s what we talked about last time.

And the final thing I wanna say about discipline is that those who are being disciplined should not lose heart or be discouraged. It says In 15:5, Proverbs 15:5, “a fool spurns his father’s discipline, but whoever heeds correction shows prudence.” 15:5, a fool spurns his father’s discipline, but whoever heeds correction shows prudence.

And then again, seven Verses later, 15:12, “a mocker resents correction, he will not consult the wise.” So, a child should not resent the correction, a child should submit to the correction, should be glad about the correction. Glad to have a father and a mother who will train the child, the son or daughter. So that’s the whole approach to disciplining.

Now, the Book of Proverbs also gives us a listing of certain problems that parents are gonna face with their children and how they handle them. Probably the central problem that parents face is the issue of disobedience or rebellion. You need to tell a child to do something and they don’t do it. You tell a child not to do something, and they do it. How can that be? Now, Bill Cosby says it’s insanity or brain damage. That’s his approach.

He thinks it’s brain damage. You say, Don’t touch that thing, you turn away, turn back and they’ve touched it. And he thinks it’s brain damage. Well, I’m not so sure it’s brain damage, but I think that there’s definitely a character issue. I think our hearts are bent toward rebellion. Look at Proverbs 24:21-22. The real issue on disobedience is not parent-child, it’s child-God, that’s the real issue. It’s the relationship between the child and God. So 24:21-22 says, “Fear the Lord and the king, my son, and do not join with the rebellious. For those two will send sudden destruction upon them, and who knows what calamities they can bring.”

Now, so what the father is saying to his son here is fear authority structures, and there’s two of them in this Verse. You’ve got God, the ultimate authority and then the king, kind of governmental authorities. And so parents are to train their children to submit to authority, because if they don’t, there’s going to be consequences down the road. Consequences with the government in this case, king, and ultimately, consequences with God himself. Fear the Lord and the king, my son and do not join with the rebellious, for those two will send sudden destruction upon them, and who knows what calamities they can bring. Now, where does disobedience lead? Well, it can lead to heartbreak for parents. 

Look at 10:1, Proverbs 10:1. “A wise son brings joy to his father, but a foolish son grief to his mother.” In other words, if you have a wise son you can rejoice in that relationship. Father will rejoice in that relationship, a foolish son brings grief to his mother, there’s sadness in the relationship. I think one of the biggest mistakes that parents make is trying to be too friendly with their kids too soon. Do you know what I’m talking about? They wanna be pals with them right off? And I think it’s good to be friends with your children, but I’m kind of playing for the 60% of their life rather than the first 40%. I’m kind of hoping for the last two thirds, not that we don’t have a loving… Actually, we do have a very loving relationship, but we are specifically trying to be mom and dad right now, not buddy. And so one of the most important things that a mom and dad can do is train the children to submit to authority. And so they want to have a good relationship, and if you wanna have a good relationship, then train up a wise son or daughter. And they’ll bring joy to you the rest of their lives.

Look at 15:20. “A wise son brings joy to his father, but a foolish man despises his mother.” Now, it’s kind of interesting, it starts out in 10:1 a foolish son brings grief to his mother, but by the time we’re at 15:20, the foolish man is despising his mother, so we see a degeneration here in the book of Proverbs, look at 19:26. 19:26 says, “He who robs his father and drives out his mother is a son who brings shame and disgrace.” Boy, it’s getting worse. At first, we had just the foolish son, then we have a foolish man despising his mother, then we have somebody who’s robbing his father and driving out his mother, bringing shame and disgrace. Now 28:24. 28:24 says, “He who robs his father or mother and says it’s not wrong, he is a partner to him who destroys.” So now he’s robbing his parents and has no conscience about it. He’s got absolutely no conviction that it’s wrong. His heart is dead and then the final in the sequence is 20:20, Proverbs 20:20. “If a man curses his father or mother, his lamp will be snuffed out in pitch darkness.” That’s the final end.

A man who curses his father or mother. And why is that? Because father and mother represents authority to that child. That’s why the Ten Commandments says honour your father and mother, that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth. And so there’s a degeneration in here, and it all begins with disobedience, with rebellion at the start. The ultimate end is groaning. Chapter 5:11 and following says, “At the end of your life you will groan and when your flesh and body are spent, you will say how I hated discipline, how my heart spurned correction. I would not obey my teachers or listen to my instructors. I have come to the brink of utter ruin in the midst of the whole assembly.”

So that’s the dark path. It’s the path of disobedience and it starts young, doesn’t it? Starts right from the beginning. And so parents are to train their children in obedience, and the ultimate standard here, I think is in the Lord’s Prayer, Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven.

That’s a high standard, isn’t it? So in our household, your children need to obey here in this household, the way that the angels do in heaven. And you know what our slogan is on that. How do the angels obey in heaven? All the way, right away and with a happy spirit. All the way, right away and with a happy spirit. And so in our household, if any child fails on one of those three points, it’s disobedience, that’s simple. If they obey all the way right away, but they grumble, moan, and complain about it, it’s disobedience. If they say, “Sure, dad, I’ll do that,” and then three hours later, guess what? It’s not done. It’s disobedience. Jesus even told a story about that. Remember about the son who said, “Sure, I’ll go out and work in the field,” and he never went, never went. So thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Obey like the angels do, all the way, right away with a happy spirit.

Another problem that parents face these days is that of disrespect. “Yes, mother. Argh!” this kind of thing, it grieves my heart and I can do the imitations and all that, but I don’t want to…I don’t wanna play it out, you’ve seen it before, and it should grieve you too. This is not acceptable. This is not a proper way for a child to respond to a parent. The rolling eyes, the sigh, all that kind of thing. It’s disrespect, it’s really a form of rebellion. It says In 30:11 and following, “There are those who curse their fathers and do not bless their mothers. There are those who are pure in their own eyes and yet not cleansed of their filth. There are those whose eyes are ever so haughty, whose glances are so disdainful.” Have you ever seen that look? The haughty eyes, the disdainful glance, the rolling look? You know what I’m saying? The rebel sigh, it’s in one of our hymns. “Alright, I’ll do it,” like that. And then 30:17 is even tougher. Now, I didn’t write this. I don’t want you to think I wrote this, okay. I didn’t stick this in your Bible. It’s here though. 30:17, “The eye that mocks a father, that scorns obedience to a mother will be pecked out by the ravens of the valley and eaten by vultures.” Why did you have to read that? Well, first of all, it’s in the Bible, so it’s worth reading. But I think what it’s talking about here is the eye, the rolling eye, the scorn… It really is showing an attitude of the heart, and the heart attitude is one of rebellion against God.

So actually, I use that verse to say, “Okay, that’s the big bad Bible Verse, I’m your dad and I love you, and I’m just going to discipline the look. I’m not gonna be doing any pecking out or any vulture thing right now, I’m just going to discipline you okay, before we get the big bad Bible on you, okay, who’s gonna come in and do even worse, okay, let’s not have the rolling eye. We’re not gonna have that kind of look in our family. We’re gonna say yes, dad and do it right away.” That’s all.

Another problem that children face is complaining. Of course, you all have conquered that, I’m sure. So I’m not really talking to any of you. I’m sure none of you have complained in years about any of the circumstances that face you because you know that it says in Philippians 2:14, “Do everything without complaining or arguing.” So complaining is right out of all you mature people. But for those of you that are still training those that are complaining realise that it’s a big problem. It’s a big issue. One of the things that I heard recently from a pastor that really stuck with me. And I think there’s so much theological truth to it, and it’s profound. Whenever he was greeted by somebody and somebody asked how are you doing? Or how is it going for you? His answer is always the same, Better than I deserve.

Stop and think about that. Better than I deserve. Is there a theological truth behind that? Yeah, all of us are sinners and we deserve the wrath of God for our sin. Instead we get grace and from his fullness, one blessing after another. Isn’t that what God’s given us? One grace after another. “Yes, but I deserve it,” but no, you don’t. One blessing after another. And so when we’re feeding cold cereal to our children, you know the ready to eat. I’m not talking cold oatmeal, I’m talking about pouring cereal, that stuff is expensive. Have you priced… It’s over $3 a box. And I’ve actually heard from time to time complaints about cold cereal, which I’ve eaten most of my life, and I like it. What do you like? Corn Flakes, Do you eat cold cereal? No? Never? You guys? Fruit Loops. See, not only is it good for you, it tastes good. How can we ever get sick of the things that God gives us, but yet there’s complaining. So listen, it shows a heart attitude, Better than I deserve. God is giving me nutritious food, it tastes good to me, and even if it is the same thing, 40 years in a row. That’s in the desert… Remember, manna and all that, even if it’s the same thing 40 years in a row, it’s still grace from God, isn’t it? And so we’re weeding out complaining.

Another is the issue of setting a bad example. Siblings are to set a good example for their children. Look at 10:17, “He who heeds discipline shows the way to life, but whoever ignores correction leads others astray.” So a big brother or a big sister can lead another astray by how they act. But a wise brother, wise sister will say, Hey I have a responsibility to the family and the responsibility to set a good example. I wanna set a good example. I don’t wanna be foolish, I don’t wanna spurn correction. I want to yield to correction and I don’t wanna lead others astray. 

Well, these other topics, I think we’re gonna cover. I think there’s a couple other things that I think are worth discussing within this context, we’re gonna talk about sexual purity another time. But it’s remarkable how the issue of marital purity is taught within the context of father and mother instruction to a son. At least three times in the Book of Proverbs, the father and mother are instructing the son to watch out for a certain type of woman. And since the Book of Proverbs, interestingly enough, is written, mom and dad to son and not to daughter, it just seems to be just the structure of the book, but we also can extend it out to daughters, there’s certain kind of young men that you need to watch out for and be careful about. Okay, and so there’s instruction about that, we’re gonna read through it, but if you wanna just look at the reference, Chapter 7 Verse 1-27, and also Chapter 6 Verse 20-35.

We’ll talk about purity at another topic, we’re gonna give a whole topic to it, but it also extends even to what people wear. Even what young ladies wear. If you look at Proverbs 11:22, Proverbs 11:22, interesting Proverb. It says, “Like a gold ring in a pig snout is a beautiful woman who shows no discretion.” A very interesting Proverb. And I think Proverbs is spicy. I’m telling you what… You read something that’s like, Whoa, it doesn’t leave a bland impact on you, a gold ring in a pig snout? What’s the point? It’s still a pig, even though there’s a gold ring there. And what is it saying, the saying is what is truly important is the character of the individual. And the outer dress is not so important, except in that it can lead others astray.

And so I think it’s up to, especially parents to be with their younger daughters and say, “Listen, dress with modesty, with decency, don’t lead your brothers in Christ astray. But dress with modesty. Don’t be like a gold ring in a pig snout, beautiful dress, showing out physically what it is you have to offer, but there’s nothing in the soul, in the spirit, but rather be… ” As it says in 1 Peter 3, “Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes, instead it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is a great worth in God’s sight.”

The final word of advice tonight, 23:22-25, it says, “Listen to your father who gave you life and do not despise your mother when she is old. Buy the truth and do not sell it.” Isn’t that something? Did any of your parents ever give you advice in the stock market? Okay, what you want to do is you want to buy and not sell. Alright, hold on to it. If it’s good stock in the end, it’s going to pay incredible dividends.

Well, in effect, this father’s saying, That’s what truth is all about, buy it and don’t sell. Don’t ever give up that stock. Buy the truth and don’t sell it. Get wisdom, discipline and understanding. The father of a righteous man has great joy, he who has a wise son delights in him. May your father and mother be glad, may she who gave you birth, rejoice.

Prayer

Won’t you close with me in prayer. Father, we thank you for the wisdom that comes from contemplating your word. We thank you for the spicy truths found in the Book of Proverbs. We thank you that they wake us up and help us to see things that we might have missed. Father, I pray that you would help every father and mother who’s listening to me today who’s still training their children, that they might raise them in righteousness. That they might lead them to Christ. I pray for any that are grandparents that are praying earnestly for their grandchildren, that they pray wisdom for their children as they raise their grandchildren. Father, I pray for this church, First Baptist Church, as a community of faith, that we may be conducive to parents raising Godly children. Father, I pray that we might raise a generation of those who fear you, who love you and who will obey you. And all the more who will stand before you on that final day, blameless and with great joy through faith in Jesus Christ, in whose name we pray, Amen.

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